Wednesday, January 23, 2008

A little sunshine

A few days ago, I was taking a walk in my colony lane. I was in a very bad mood. It’s been a very gloomy and dull winter for me. I love winters, but this time around I’ve missed the Sunshine in my face. The Sun had been absconding for a few days now. It was cold inside the house, outside my house, inside my old car. The cold had seeped into my bones and made me miserable and slow. I hated it.

Anyway, I was walking down my colony lane trying to pep-up myself with some endorphins. Cosy in my layers and layers of wool, I tried to appreciate my surroundings. The beautiful house I live in, the lush, green belt that surrounds it, the quiet and solitude it entails. But the chill and the darkness around me stopped me from warming up to all that I have. I was not happy. I wasn’t unhappy either. Just apathetic.

Then suddenly, I saw something speeding towards me with shocking energy. My heart skipped a beat. My slow senses snapped up trying to decipher what in God’s name is running towards me with such force and what the hell for? Before my brain could catch up, I was swamped by such love and affection that I felt it before I could see the source of it. For a while I was stumped, why was I being subjected to such unquestioned love and affection. No warnings, no questions like “may I”, “ may I not”, no pretensions, no doubts. Just a wholehearted need to love and be loved. Gone was the painful silence in my head, the darkness and the cold, and the lethargy in my bones. At that point, the sun could have disappeared forever and I wouldn’t have cared less.

The 6-month-old Golden retriever in my colony had broken free from her mistress. As she was scolded and dragged away for being so naughty, I could feel the sunshine in and around me. Anyone watching could have seen it in my eyes. ☺